Dude Looks Like a Lady...

I ran back into Wamego tonight for the annual July 4^th Parade; It used to be at noon, but heat has changed the time to evening. After it was over, I grabbed my cop friend K and we went into Lincoln Street Station for 1 beverage. For some reason, the topic between us was about a somewhat prominent business person and how perhaps he should don rainbow suspenders. Then we decided that perhaps inventing yellow suspenders fashioned as ‘yellow brick roads’ + tiny rainbow appliqué’s should be his mode of dress…

This conversation led to the ‘pooper scoopers’ at the end of the parade, and how I’d come up with a quick costume for one of them: MM. I was asked on Monday to supply a wig and dress for one of my former students; he had to dress as a woman during the parade as part of his community service work! I didn’t ask what his crime had been; I was just tickled that this unobtrusive, quiet cowboy kid had to dress up and wear huge knockers! Tee hee! I just so happened to have a red wig hanging on my clothesline and a leopard print skirt and top with matching jewelry. (Yes, MM did wear this, but I shortened the skirt to make it look funnier.)

As we were making up a crock of crap about ‘rainbows’, a guy came over to our table to shake hands with K. I wasn’t quite sure what his name was (several months ago, he’d left his number at the gas station expecting me to call, which I didn’t cause I think he’s way younger), but I will call him R. Since my life always seems to be a series of coincidences, I thought it incredibly bizarre that the first thing he would say to us was …. ‘Hey, don’t want you two to think I’m gay or something, but I really want to dress up as a woman… ‘ I noticed that R’s hair was full of big bouncy curls now and he said he was growing it out so he could dye it blonder—did we know how he could look like a transvestite? (These are an extreme rarity in Wamego KS!)

K and I are giving each other looks—was this guy drunk or has he lost his mind??! We went along with it… but advised him he’d have to get rid of the facial hair. Turned out that R had no driver’s license anymore and wanted to dress as a woman so that he could drive and wouldn’t get stopped… Ha! Let’s just tell that right to a cop! K went so far as to tell R that he wouldn’t give him another ticket—but only if he’d blow him a kiss!

Still am not really sure whether this guy was pulling our chain or not… What a weird topic of conversation.