Do not swat your child on the fanny with a little stick. By the time they grow up, they'll tell everyone it was a two-by-four.
Double-check the door lock when using a public Johnie-on-the-Job.
Don't paint your child's bedroom pink for a surprise, just because YOU like it.
Never think you can taste ALL the types of premixed drinks from a liquor store in one night.
When writing a check at Walmart, hide the front, so whackos behind don't get your phone #.
If you run around the house in just a bra, make sure the front door is locked.
Don't cast your fishing pole while riding in a boat full of people if you haven't had practice.
When removing pantyhose, don't cry out “Oh no! My skin is coming off!” in front of young children.
Don't let your children walk by a street gutter after watching the movie “It”. And it goes without saying not to raspingly utter: “We ALL Float down Here!”
1 comment:
I still don't know where to leave a comment when you leave one on mine... and you have a few blogs. Anyhew, that one about removing the pantyhose is absolutely hilarious! You might not be able to drink ALL the premixed booze but you can sure give it a good try. I don't recall ever trying to do that but when we were young I do remember taking a shot (get it?) at the drink menu.
It's kind of funny, I feel the same way about asking somebody out as you feel about being asked out (why do I even WANT to do this) or being around someone I know wants me to ask them out.(Did that make any sense?) Since that time I have become a bit better with trusting people but sometimes I wonder... there is quite often an ulterior motive with even what seem to be the most honest people.(I love you just as you are... but change) I was in my early twenties when my first love tore my heart out and used it as a hacky sack... you think you get over these things but maybe you don't. Given how I am hard wired, I always seem to be a little low, maybe sometimes more than others...B I always appreciate your thoughts and comments. I read once that you can cause an explosion in the toilet by mixing bleach and ammonia... safety first. Til soon, Dan.
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